Minding the Gap

Hey-o so I have arrived!!!


All and all a pretty uneventful travel day. Flew out of SAN to LAX to Heathrow. In San Diego, I was in the commuter terminal… I had some time to kill so I grabbed a water and a better homes and garden (yes I am my mother’s daughter) and cozed up in those sweet, sweet airport chairs. After sitting down, I realized the error of my ways, as I gazed across the terminal I locked eyes with the TSA security, ah yes, that is right body scanners are in full effect now in san diego. So I promptly repositioned myself next to security to watch all the drama go down. For an hour plus, I watched people go through the check point and only about 2 people were asked to do the body scan.. I tried to make eye contact with them before they committed to the scan and shake my head mouthing, no don’t do it don’t do it, but sadly they were too focused on the TSA agent and ended up relinquishing their nudie photos over.. I mean last time I checked you are usually compensated for photos of that nature.

So arrive LAX, and take the fancy little bus system over to the international terminal. The bus lady said oh yes get off here for tom brady, so I hopped off and as soon as I was off realized there was no signage for Tom Brady,,,, right,.,,, so the this little Indian lady and I were in the same boat, stuck in random terminal and needing to get to Bristish Airways. We found an aiport lady who directed us, that it was just a short walk outside to the left and that’s the terminal, so the little lady and I took off together, there was a massive moving walky thing so we chatted. She told me about her trip to SD, her daughter in London, her son in SD, her last six months of traveling, her granddaughter that drives (she’s grown up now), her grandson in law school, etc etc etc… yeah, getting the picture?? this was not a short walk by any means.

Finally we get outside, and are lost, again. At this point my little Indian friend was wheezing and she had a bad knee, so she was moving super slow. I felt really bad and offered to carry her bags, but she declined.. I dunno if she thought it was creepy or not since they always say mind your luggage and don’t let others by your bag yadda yadda yadda, but I felt bad not asking. We stop again asking for directions and once again were guaranteed it was a short walk, so we head toward the phantom terminal “just to your left” and walked for another decent amount. Arrive Tom Brady terminal, no sign of check in, again stop and ask for directions. And again “just keep walking , it really close,and just up three floors”, gorgeous. I found us a lift though and me and my friend jumped in and finally arrived at the glorious British Airway line. And by glorious I mean endless lines to check in and a big old DELYAED sign next to my flight. Fourty five minutes later and after befriending a little finish girl, I arrived at the counter.

Actually, I guess befriending is a strong word to describe encounter, she spoke Finnish, I spoke English. Although we did find some commonality on dog and hi… other than that is was all facial expressions and awkward hand gestures. Which she seemed to enjoy, I think I’d be a big hit in Finland. Anyways, checked in and the flight was delayed an hour twenty. So I cozed myself up to the airport bar, the same one I actually sat at before I left for argentina… Killed a little time and then head for security…. Excited for another chance at the TSA groping, I mean security check.

So I rounded the corner and to my sweet, sweet delight there was an image scanner and numerous TSA individuals slapping on the lovely blue latex gloves. Oh yes, it’s my big day I thought.  So I performed the typical TSA strip down to just leggings and a tshirt and proudly walked towards the security guard ready to decline the body scan and cause a scene when I was directed to the pat down. Instead, I was waved though the metal dector and given a sweet smile approving me to go forward. WTH,, serious, that’s it!! Lame, although I saw a little business lady getting her TSA pat down and I wasn’t sure who felt more violated me watching the whole process or her actually receiving. I probably go with her.

So board the plan, the largest plane I’ve ever been on, two stories, hey-o. I climbed into my window seat and waited with heavy anticipation as to who my row companions would be or more like who my space violator would be… time ticks by and they announce they are closing the door and preparing for departure, oh heck yes, whole row to myself. I waited for take off and the fasten seat belt sign to disappear then I grabbed the extra blankets and pillows and built myself a nice little bed across the seats. I was out cold for a couple hours but then I woke up because my hips hurt… apparently child bearing hips and British Airways chairs do not mix… or I’m just getting old. Either way, my sleeping was in and out after that.

We made up about 30 minutes in the air and we got the glorious prepare for landing speech and just as we were going to descend the pilot gets on and lets us know we are going to have to circle some… so on the lovely map they share with you, you get to watch the plane go around and around and around in a circle. Finally, after 20minutes, we land and then taxi to the gate, the wrong gate as the pilot later disclosed and drove to a new gate, really british airways? really? my coworkers are texting me they arrived and are waiting at the taxi station and requesting etas, I was supposed to arrive an hour and a half before them… 45 minutes later the baggage thingy starts moving and my lovely neon pink bag pops out, alright here we go I thought, time, to just head out to the taxi station, then I realized nope, I am in terminal 5 my coworkers are in terminal 1. So I set off on my next mission get to terminal 1, but at this point I was exhausted and cold so I maximized my lost little girl face and got some quick and efficient directions from airport staff and bam, arrive at terminal 1, grab a coffee, and head out to grab a taxi with my coworkers.

We get in the taxi and I end up in the copilot like seat with my back against the direction we are going… take off towards the city.. I dunno if it was the extra large coffee on an empty stomach or jetlag or motion sickness from sitting the wrong direction in the cab, but oh my word I felt like I was going to yak. I tried to keep it together because if I didn't it would all end up on my coworkers lap who was sitting right across from me… 40 minutes later we arrive at the hotel and I am the first one of the group to check in. The hotel is pretty sick but at this point I am spinning and trying to keep from spewing. I am escorted to my posh little room and the duder gives me a tour of my room explaining all the fancy-smancy parts… I’m trying to rush him along… because I really just want to spew, finally he leaves and I bow to the porcelain god and pass out on the fancy pants bed. All and all a less than glorious first few hours in London.

I took a nap and woke up feeling better, oh yes… I had about an hour to kill before dinner so I got dressed and walked over to the Marble Arch and Hyde Park. It was already dark and there were all these Christmas lights up, super pretty. I got some nice photos, I think, I hope, sadly I forgot my usb cord for my camera, so I can’t share any of these photos. For dinner my coworkers and I went to Maze, it’s one of Gordon Ramesy’s restaurants, it was pretty good. We walked around a bit and called it an early night because we were so tired. I was out cold at 8:15, living the dream.

Wednesday morning was the first day heading to work, sooo we left the hotel at 730 and headed for the underground, oh my word it was intense, tons of people in very small spaces… It was in the underground tunnels that I learned a very important point, walk with a purpose. It you don’t you will be walked on or through, you must walk with the same authority as everyone else… and yield to no one because there are a line of twenty people behind them that will take advantage of the chance as well… and mind the gap. Yes, I learned all of these things the hard way.

We headed to waterloo.   At waterloo I befriended a nice man that actually lives in waterloo... we chatted while i waited for the train... he asked if could spot him 10,000 GBP, I told him that was a lot of money.  He told me he really thinks the we should start importing iron from mars, that's where all the money is.  I told him I've never been to mars.  He told me that life is much like a Christmas Story because it is about a debtors prison.  I asked him if he was in a debtors prison, he laughed really hard and then asked for a cup of tea.  Interesting fellow to say the least.  Our train was coming, so I gave him some money for tea and as we boarded the train my boss advised me not to talk to strange men.

We got on a train to chessington south, the area were our subsidiary is. Once off at chessington we had to do an additional 10 minute walk to the office…. We arrived at the office at about 930,,, yep a nice two hour commute. Did I mention it’s 0 degrees Celsius? Baaahhh-eeerrrr.. Unfortunately before I left, I was unable to find thermal business casual wear, so I am a bit cold.

Worked a fatty 8 hours and then headed back to catch the train. Again the timing was a bit off which resulted in a hard sprint the last two blocks in order to catch the train back… the sprint was mandatory as the next train didn’t come for an hour and there was no inside area to sit. We would have died. We literally boarded with a second to spare. But at least we were warm.

We made it back to the city, back to the hotel, and then headed back out for dinner. Nothing too exciting. Today we woke up and repeated. Although we left a little earlier and timed the trains a little better and it was only a hour and a half commute. Sweetness.

So that’s pretty much it for now... maybe things will get spicer this weekend in paris.